The New Yorker

A User’s Guide To Your New Thirtysomething Body

What The New Roaring Twenties Will Be Like – cowritten with Irving Ruan

Exactly How Famous I Want To Be

Advice My Parents Gave Me Versus Advice I Will Give My Kids cowritten with Irving Ruan

    • Published in the March 1, 2021 print edition as ‘The Advice Gap”

Why Your Dog Needs To Be Leashed During Walks (But Mine Does Not)

Sleep-Training Methods For Adults

How To Update Your Wardrobe For The Fall

Compliments I’ve Received In My Thirties, Translated

Things That Were Supposed To Cure My Acne And What They Actually Did

Frequently Asked Questions: My Engagement

A Perfect, Preemptive Obituary For My Ex-Boyfriend

A Few Things To Know About My Sister, Your New Wife, On Your Wedding Day


Phishing Emails No ’90s Kid Can Resistcowritten with Megan Rogers

Jokes I’ve Told That My Male Colleagues Didn’t Like  – cowritten with Ali Kelley, Kate Herzlin, and Ysabel Yates


Instructions For Your Upcoming Stay At My Illegal Airbnb

Points in Case

I Thought I Loved Derrick To The Moon And Back, But We Still Have 318,000 Miles Left In This Voyage And I Think I Might Kill Him

DIY Face Masks That Heal Everything Except The Adolescent Damage From Claire Zabicky

Weekly Humorist

More Accurate Names For A Virtual Meeting  – cowritten with Ali Kelley, Kate Herzlin, and Ysabel Yates

New Uses For Obsolete Bras  – illustrated by Sarah Kempa

The Top Romantic Comedies Of 2098

Welcome To Greg & Jackie’s Wedding Site—F*ck Yeah!

Quiz: Tender Catcall Bestowed Upon Me Or Michael Bolton Song?

Reading 10,000 Books A Year Is Easy—Just Do What I Do!

The Belladonna

Thing Women And Venus Have In Common – cowritten with Ali Kelley, Kate Herzlin, and Ysabel Yates

Modern Greeting Cards For (Almost) Every Occasion

Other Possible Relationships For Your Eyebrows

President Trump’s Very Good Recovery Plan For Puerto Rico